Have you ever started something that you knew with an absolute positiveness that it was doomed to fail? That, for me, is this blog. I can't keep a journal worth a lickin. I've tried. First was when i was around ten years old. That journal lasted a good two entries. The next was when i was a little older. It ranged from 2003-2008. It contained intermittent entries that usually talked about boys. A lot of information would be left out because i would get so ridiculously overwhelmed by what I needed to say, that I'd just leave it all out and start fresh. Then again, I have a huge loathing of repeating myself. The first time i tell a story it's quite exciting. Any time after that I feel like people can do without hearing what happened. So why start something that I know isn't going to work out? Beats me. Because I can.
So right now my head is ringing with a little bit of too much thought. You see, I love to read. But it's kind of overkill to read four books in two days. It gets to the point where your mind goes numb and you think too much. Well, not necessarily think too much, but too in depth. Who actually goes so far as to verbalize their thoughts in their head? oo, me! Well, if i read too much.
Also, I'm a little tired because I forgot to take my iron supplements last night and this morning. I kept falling asleep re-reading about the four gospels (there's a midterm coming up).
I'm also a teeny bit overwhelmed by my to-do list. It's a kind of random list that doesn't necessarily need to be done right away. It's stuff I need to do but keep forgetting. For instance, I need to buy a new SD card to replace my old one because my twin brother asked me to send him some more pictures. I have to go and buy a lock because I'm borrowing my roommate's. I need to write about five missionaries letters...since, well, july. I need to return a gift card that a friend left at another friend's apartment. The list just keeps going on and on. and I had to write it down because I'll forget. That's how my mind works.
Actually, my mind is, well, different. Scatterbrained would be a very good adjective. I reckon that most people's brains are at least a little bit organized. But my tends to be vehemently against organization. Which is why my room suffers. It, too is a mess. haha. But really, I can't even go as far as to try to plan a schedule. My mind would just refuse it. It would be too constraining and I don't think I have enough self-discipline to enforce it.
I'm also a very spontaneous person. I have these impulses that I usually try to suppress. I don't think it works out too hot. I'll get impulses to do seemingly innocent things such as to read, but then I'll end up reading for two days straight. Or I'll want to buy food or clothes or go somewhere random. Or do something slightly insane. It just happens. But a lot of the stuff I want to do are just whims, so then I get unmotivated pretty quickly. Sometimes so quickly that I never do the thing I wanted to do.
I also tend to be very loquacious. The more tired I am, the more I talk. The more nervous I am, the more I talk. The happier I am, the more I, well, laugh. I love to laugh. Except for it has a debilitating effect on me. You see, when I laugh REALLY REALLY REALLY hard, I just drop. I guess I can't multitask or something, because if I'm standing, I just drop to my knees. I also cackle when I laugh really hard. My twin brother and I, when it comes down to it, have almost identical laughs. Which is sad. And we get made fun of for our laughs. BUT the good thing is my normal--what you said isn't that hilarious--laugh isn't awkward. Sometimes, on rare occasions, I do snort. But, like I said, on RARE occasions.
I also like to listen to Mariah Carey. But that actually spawned from my twin brother being obsessed with her. So, her new album, in partial tribute Minnie Driver, is entitled Memoirs of an imperfect angel. Minnie's album was called Perfect Angel. In any case, I figured that would be a good name for my blog that won't talk about anything in specific. Just ramblings. Well, I might put in events from time to time. IF i ever write again.
~Sheila
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