6:00 am: Even after doing 4 1/2 hours of reading yesterday, my homework still wasn't finished. #EnglishMajorProbs. Anyway, I read all that I could until I needed to start getting ready.
8:20 am: Although I told Ben he could take leftovers and I would make a sandwich, let's be real. I wasn't going to make a sandwich. So my lunch was composed of a few slices of ham, one piece of cheese, tortilla chips, 3 red vines, an apple, a banana, and a ding dong.
8:30 am: I can't find my coat. I pray that today is warmer as I grab my computer, "lunch," and books that, together, are about as thick as the length of my foot. PS, just so everyone knows, it was already like 32 degrees outside by 9. PSS, I still have no idea where my coat is.
8:35 am: I call my mom. The conversation was ok until she tells me how my sisters is mad at her because she is apparently not giving her daughter enough attention. Except, that's not it. I'd already talked to my sister, and she's mad for the same reason we all are: she places the importance of my nephew above everyone and anything else. My wedding? Oh, she didn't come because she "had" to babysit him. Christmas? She wouldn't come out because she had "responsibilities." AKA my nephew. So anyway, my sister was peeved because it's a little weird when your mother makes a Facebook status about missing one particular nephew. Just him. NO one else. Are you following me? So anyway, I tell her this and also mention how not only did she not come out to Ben's graduation, but she's already told me she won't come to mine. Except, she tells me that those were because of her weight. Sidenote: she's paranoid that she's too overweight to fly. Anyway, I'm frustrated by this point and tell her of a person we both know who's heavier than her and flies all the time. Her response: she starts sobbing and telling me I can't do this to her and then hangs up.
9:00 am: I arrive at my new internship and try to deal with the emotional chaos and keep myself together.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): Don't ever call me again. You're bad for me.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): I don't ever want to see you again.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): Don't come here
9:04 am: (Text from Mom): I don't need what you do to me.
I was a little confused by her severe response to my statement (not the being disowned thing, because this is the third time in the last year and a half that she's said that to me.)
11:30 am: Social media meeting! With all the outpouring of new information, it's fun and slightly overwhelming. I wonder how I'll be able to complete all my responsibilities when I'm only interning 10 hours a week.
12:50 pm: I call Ben to sort through the mom thing. He points out that my mom tells me she never wants to see me again approximately ever 6 months.
1:15 pm: I get to swallow my pride and pick up my "accessibility" papers. Accessibility=disability. Pretty much with adjusting to new medication and having already 2 surgeries in the last 2 months (the last one being last Friday), I tend to miss class. These papers let my teachers know that my body is legit screwed up and I'm not just ditching for kicks and giggles.
1:20 pm: Remember those snacks I packed for lunch? Time to start devouring them.
1:35 pm: The Senior course in which we get to study the poems of Emily Dickinson. She's the one who wrote, "Tell all the truth but tell it slant." The hard part about her is that her truths are so slant there are no subjects. No but really. Most of her poems are written in such a way that because there is no subject, there are layers of meaning to be understood. Like a bajillion layers. You'll be reading along and you're like oh there's a maiden, and there's marriage, and there's death and God, too? Ok.
3:00 pm: My rhetoric class. The takeaway: medieval religious authorities like Thomas Aquinas (and everyone else, too) believed women to be inferior to men. They were not their "help meet" but their "helper." Thus, if a man wanted help, he should go ask a man, unless it's in the procreation department. Peachy.
4:15 pm: Call my dad trying to understand why my mom reacted so harshly. The only thing that I can think of is that she maybe needs to adjust her medication. After a very hesitant pause, he agrees and tells me he got an emergency call at work from a friend of my mom's to whom she'd given a suicide message to. She hasn't done that in years, which is why my dad feels something is off. But of course, she doesn't trust any of us to believe that we're telling the truth.
4:30 pm: Have to hang up because I'm now at work. Again, I have to readjust my thought processes from what I just heard to getting caught up at work.
6:00 pm: Tired, I leave work for home. As I walk in the kitchen I see a cute note my husband left for me.
6:20 pm: Eat frozen pizza! Guys, I usually eat way better than today. I promise.
8:55 pm: Finish writing blog.
8:20 am: Although I told Ben he could take leftovers and I would make a sandwich, let's be real. I wasn't going to make a sandwich. So my lunch was composed of a few slices of ham, one piece of cheese, tortilla chips, 3 red vines, an apple, a banana, and a ding dong.
8:30 am: I can't find my coat. I pray that today is warmer as I grab my computer, "lunch," and books that, together, are about as thick as the length of my foot. PS, just so everyone knows, it was already like 32 degrees outside by 9. PSS, I still have no idea where my coat is.
8:35 am: I call my mom. The conversation was ok until she tells me how my sisters is mad at her because she is apparently not giving her daughter enough attention. Except, that's not it. I'd already talked to my sister, and she's mad for the same reason we all are: she places the importance of my nephew above everyone and anything else. My wedding? Oh, she didn't come because she "had" to babysit him. Christmas? She wouldn't come out because she had "responsibilities." AKA my nephew. So anyway, my sister was peeved because it's a little weird when your mother makes a Facebook status about missing one particular nephew. Just him. NO one else. Are you following me? So anyway, I tell her this and also mention how not only did she not come out to Ben's graduation, but she's already told me she won't come to mine. Except, she tells me that those were because of her weight. Sidenote: she's paranoid that she's too overweight to fly. Anyway, I'm frustrated by this point and tell her of a person we both know who's heavier than her and flies all the time. Her response: she starts sobbing and telling me I can't do this to her and then hangs up.
9:00 am: I arrive at my new internship and try to deal with the emotional chaos and keep myself together.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): Don't ever call me again. You're bad for me.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): I don't ever want to see you again.
9:03 am: (Text from Mom): Don't come here
9:04 am: (Text from Mom): I don't need what you do to me.
I was a little confused by her severe response to my statement (not the being disowned thing, because this is the third time in the last year and a half that she's said that to me.)
11:30 am: Social media meeting! With all the outpouring of new information, it's fun and slightly overwhelming. I wonder how I'll be able to complete all my responsibilities when I'm only interning 10 hours a week.
12:50 pm: I call Ben to sort through the mom thing. He points out that my mom tells me she never wants to see me again approximately ever 6 months.
1:15 pm: I get to swallow my pride and pick up my "accessibility" papers. Accessibility=disability. Pretty much with adjusting to new medication and having already 2 surgeries in the last 2 months (the last one being last Friday), I tend to miss class. These papers let my teachers know that my body is legit screwed up and I'm not just ditching for kicks and giggles.
1:20 pm: Remember those snacks I packed for lunch? Time to start devouring them.
1:35 pm: The Senior course in which we get to study the poems of Emily Dickinson. She's the one who wrote, "Tell all the truth but tell it slant." The hard part about her is that her truths are so slant there are no subjects. No but really. Most of her poems are written in such a way that because there is no subject, there are layers of meaning to be understood. Like a bajillion layers. You'll be reading along and you're like oh there's a maiden, and there's marriage, and there's death and God, too? Ok.
3:00 pm: My rhetoric class. The takeaway: medieval religious authorities like Thomas Aquinas (and everyone else, too) believed women to be inferior to men. They were not their "help meet" but their "helper." Thus, if a man wanted help, he should go ask a man, unless it's in the procreation department. Peachy.
4:15 pm: Call my dad trying to understand why my mom reacted so harshly. The only thing that I can think of is that she maybe needs to adjust her medication. After a very hesitant pause, he agrees and tells me he got an emergency call at work from a friend of my mom's to whom she'd given a suicide message to. She hasn't done that in years, which is why my dad feels something is off. But of course, she doesn't trust any of us to believe that we're telling the truth.
4:30 pm: Have to hang up because I'm now at work. Again, I have to readjust my thought processes from what I just heard to getting caught up at work.
6:00 pm: Tired, I leave work for home. As I walk in the kitchen I see a cute note my husband left for me.
6:20 pm: Eat frozen pizza! Guys, I usually eat way better than today. I promise.
8:55 pm: Finish writing blog.
